July 15, 2015
So I've been really contemplating what I'm doing with my life and why I'm so anxious. I started blogging to help me get some inner thoughts and frustrations out and stopped cold turkey. I really enjoy writing and it should be a no brainer to write for the heck of it.
So back to what contemplating I thought to myself and found that I have all these goals and wants and no way will I ever accomplish it EVER! Call me a pessimist but I evaluate life as I see it and frankly what are the chances I'll ever live in Japan, enjoy a warm bath in a Japanese Onsen (those of you who don't know what an Onsen is a bathing facility or could be in a inn on or near a hot spring where you just relax with nature naked.) The idea of one fascinates me and is just so NOT me. So back to this bucket list I thought since I probably will never do any of them maybe writing it on this permanent place called the internet and not a loose leaf paper will make these goals more tangible--something worth doing and not placed in the bottom of a paper stack stuck in my closet or worst the trash!
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| Photo by: http://www.hercampus.com/school/ku/ku-bucket-list |
-I live less then five minutes from the United States-Mexico border and do not know Spanish fluently to speak it, write it or understand it. Don't get me wrong it know some but not enough where I know everything being told to me. (Sometimes people who don't know English talk to me thinking "this girl knows what I'm saying I'm just going to talk in Spanish" and I'm pick up some words and smile and nod the rest of the conversation). Therefore I'd like to learn Spanish so I can speak and write back without looking like a nodding idiot.
2. Learn Japanese and 3. Go to Japan
-So while on the topic of learning a language recently I have been immersed in Japanese culture and life. The Japanese are so different from our culture the way they think, the way they dress, lifestyle choices. Did you know that Japan has vending machines with literally everything you may ever need. For example some places in Japan may have vegetables so you don't need to travel all the way to the market to get it. I'd love to go there just for the serenity of the country and the lifestyle just to have an experience.
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| Photo by: https://spaining.wordpress.com/2015/02/01/why-japan-is-a-good-place-to-visit/ |
4. Learn how to play guitar
-This bucket list goes back to my wannabe rocker days. Who wouldn't want to rock out with their best friends jamming and bonding to your cover songs or your own tunes. Anyway still would love to learn to play so I can finally stop pretending on my air guitar.
5. Missionary Work
- To be a service to another human being whether making a home or growing food or donating clothing or simply spreading the word of my God would be amazing. It definitely wouldn't be for browning points or for my own personal satisfaction but to humble myself and give back in a world that screams selfishness.
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6. Travel the World
- My husband is a very content where he is person. He rather stay in his hometown never setting foot in an unknown place. I on the other hand not necessarily the polar opposite but just a bit more adventurous. I would love to go to Alaska and see the Northern Lights first hand, feeling the cold breeze sway through the trees onto my face. Maybe go to London and drink at a pub just to experience it. Going to Africa to see a giraffe not enclosed in a cage or a lioness low to the ground getting ready to pounce on it's prey. I feel like my life has no meaning when it sits ideally while the world has so much to offer, so many breathtaking views that other's take for granted.
7. Write a Book
-I've actually thought about doing one for awhile but my negative self has always brought me down and writer's block has shown me it's ugly face too many times. It would be amazing to write a story and have people relate to you or want to share it with others because it inspired them or made them laugh or made them feel. Although a book would be amazing to write I would first have to write something worth reading. This one is doable--so let's see what the future brings.
8.Become a Teacher
-This one is just something I've been so close to achieving it's ridiculous. If I could put a number on how close I am to getting my degree I would say 80%. What's stopping me? Well this one will lead to my number seven goal. Number 7 may be the worst and most difficult to state online for the world to see. Simply because of how embarrassing it is to me.
9. Learn to Drive
-So I'm 26 almost 27 in a couple of days and I do not have my driver's license. How stupid am I? How are 16 year old kids with no care in the world cruising around while I'm stuck at home binge watching Netflix? Well here's my story: When I was in High School my parent's were always too tired to teach me and they had money but not enough to buy driving lessons. Plus I was obsessed with my extra-curricular drama that took about four hours almost every day so when I got home no lessons for me. I got married to my High School Sweetheart who used to teach me but then realized after getting married at 19 years old that I'm better off being chauffeured to and from work.Which wasn't really why he stopped. I think it was more of a control issue. Well years later a child was born and I left my job to raise her and now he's the breadwinner and I'm stuck at home like a good little housewife. I know I sound bitter and I have no one else to blame but me but you know how we as a humans are we don't want any of the blame so we shift it to those closest to us. Anyway as the years have progressed I put driving on this pedestal and I honestly am scared to be in control of this huge piece of machinery that when not controlled correctly can actually kill a human being. So therefore learning to drive would be amazing I would lose that fear and trust myself to be responsible enough to do simple errands or finally finish school and get my degree and actually make a life.
So there you have it my innermost wants and hopefully now that it's typed I can fulfill some or all of them. Maybe I haven't humiliated myself too much.
So what's on your bucket list?
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